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xkcd.com: A webcomic of romance and math humor.

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Apples

The experimental math department's budget is under scrutiny for how much they've been spending on trains leaving Chicago at 9:00pm traveling at 45 mph.

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Fishing

'That's definitely above the catch-and-release size minimum for planetesimals.' 'I'm going to throw it back anyway.'

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Hyperacute Interdynamics

Our models fall apart where the three theories overlap; we're unable to predict what happens when a nanometer-sized squirrel eats a grapefruit with the mass of the sun.

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Chessboard Alignment

Luckily, the range is limited by the fact that the square boundary lines follow great circles.

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Inverted Catenaries

Some tires are marketed as 'all-shape tires,' but if driven in a climate with both inverted catenary falls and triangle falls, they wear out really fast.

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Website Task Flowchart

Tired of waiting on hold? Use our website to chat with one of our live agents, who are available to produce words at you 24/7!

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Bridge Clearance

A lot of the highway department's budget goes to adjusting the sign whenever the moon passes directly overhead.

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Satellite Imagery

Every weekend I take an ATV out into the desert and spend a day tracing a faint "(C) GOOGLE 2009" watermark across the landscape.

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Fifteen Years

"Want to feel old?" "Yes."

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Geologic Core Sample

If you drill at the right angle and time things perfectly, your core sample can include a section of a rival team's coring equipment.

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Service Outage

Now, if it were the *Canon* wiki, it's possible to imagine someone with a productivity-related reason for consulting it, but no one's job requires them to read that much about Admiral Daala.

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EPIRBs

'Oh no, the box is drifting out into the harbor!' 'Yeah, I wouldn't worry about losing it.'

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Beam Dump

We're adding some industrial flypaper to minimize reflection or scattering of customers who might complain.

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Car Size

'They really shouldn't let those small cars drive in traffic. I worry I'm going to kill someone if I hit one! They should have to drive on the sidewalk, safely out of the way.'

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Big and Little Spoons

Are you the annoying spoon or the sleepy spoon?

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Earthquake Prediction Flowchart

At least people who make religious predictions of the apocalypse have an answer to the question 'Why didn't you predict any of the other ones that happened recently?'

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Metric Tip

The package weighs 7 kg 9 oz.

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Repair Video

The statue should be in the likeness of whatever sculptor posted the sculpting tool repair video that was most helpful during the installation of the statue.

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Heart Mountain

Even geology papers about Heart Mountain are like, "Look, we all agree this 'volcanic gas earthquake hovercraft' thing seems like it can't possibly be right, but..."

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Airspeed

Carefully maneuvering the balloon down a mineshaft in an effort to break the OTHER altitude record

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Document Forgery

It comes with a certificate of authenticity, which comes with a certificate of authenticity, which comes with a...

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Continents

The inflection point was probably in late 1966 or 1967, so when Neil Armstrong flew to space on Gemini 8, plate tectonics was not widely accepted, but when he landed on the Moon three years later it was the mainstream consensus.

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Shielding Chart

Sharks can occasionally travel short distances through air when pursuing prey, but their attenuation coefficient is pretty high.

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Emperor Palpatine

Many things about Star Wars were not well planned out, but having a 37-year-old in old-age makeup play the Emperor in Return of the Jedi was such an incredible call.

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Planetary Rings

If you don't know where you are on Earth, the angle of satellite dishes can help constrain your latitude. If some of them are pointing straight up, you're probably near the Equator, right under the ring.

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Physics Paths

If nothing else, that reasoning definitely overturns syllogisms.

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Physics Insight

When Galileo dropped two weights from the Leaning Tower of Pisa, they put him in the history books. But when I do it, I get 'detained by security' for 'injuring several tourists.'

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Hot Water Balloon

Despite a reputation for safety, the temperatures and surprisingly high pressures make them even more dangerous than the air kind, but the NTSB refuses to investigate accidents because they insist there is no 'transportation' involved.

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Skateboard

I understand it's hard to do more than 300 feet on these 90-second rush jobs, but with a smaller ramp I'm worried the gee forces will be too high for me to do any tricks.

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Window Screen

The Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine or Home Improvement or DIY