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• Patrick Redford

The Knicks Stopped Moving And Died

The Knicks Stopped Moving And Died
Despite plenty of cause to fear that the NBA Finals would be derailed by Donald Trump's attendance and the resultant security apparatus that turned Madison Square Garden into a cage within a cage within a cage, Knicks fans showed up early Monday night, packed the house, booe...

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• Dave McKenna

Judge Reinstates Brendan Sorsby To Texas Tech, Says QB Will Miss Just Two Games

Judge Reinstates Brendan Sorsby To Texas Tech, Says QB Will Miss Just Two Games
Brendan Sorsby won the latest round in his fight to suit up come fall. On Monday, a Texas court granted the request from Texas Tech’s allegedly gambling addicted bonus baby quarterback for an injunction preventing the NCAA from barring him for the 2026 season and beyond. So...

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• Sarah Borus

Jacob Misiorowski Is Throwing So Damn Hard

Jacob Misiorowski Is Throwing So Damn Hard
In the third inning of the Brewers' 7-1 win over the Rockies on Saturday, Milwaukee pitcher Jacob Misiorowski threw a four-seam fastball low and outside to Kyle Karros for a ball. The pitch was special and routine all at once. Its measured velocity of 103.7 mph makes it the ...

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• Giri Nathan

Mirra Andreeva Did The Inevitable

Mirra Andreeva Did The Inevitable
I can't say that "amount of that dog in them" has always factored into my evaluation of a tennis prospect, but it should, and with Mirra Andreeva, it was always the central factor. In civilian life, being well-adjusted as a good thing, but in tennis, its opposite can be a ki...

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• Kathryn Xu

Monaco Will Always Be Like This

Monaco Will Always Be Like This
I am sorry to report that despite the FIA extending the program yet another year, the Monaco Experiment is still a failure. The battle between engineers trying to "make cars fast" and "let cars pass" has, at least in Monaco, resulted in racing that allows for neither and res...

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• Ray Ratto

Portugal Belongs To Cristiano Ronaldo For A Little Bit Longer

Portugal Belongs To Cristiano Ronaldo For A Little Bit Longer
It's almost time for the World Cup. Before the tournament, we'll be previewing each of the top 15 teams by FIFA rankings that made the tournament. Why the top 15? Because that's how many we needed to do in order for the USMNT to make the cut. You can read all of our pre...

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• Chris Thompson

Border Security Theatrics Are Rising At History’s Stupidest World Cup

Border Security Theatrics Are Rising At History’s Stupidest World Cup
For a World Cup host nation, the soccer is largely incidental. Even more obviously disposable are soaring ideas of bringing the international community together in a peaceful celebration of yadda yadda. In the case of the United States under the Trump administration, the poi...

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• Billy Haisley

Forget A Generation, Morocco Is Simply Golden

Forget A Generation, Morocco Is Simply Golden
It's almost time for the World Cup. Before the tournament, we'll be previewing each of the top 15 teams by FIFA rankings that made the tournament. Why the top 15? Because that's how many we needed to do in order for the USMNT to make the cut. You can read all of our pre...

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• Maitreyi Anantharaman

The Crossword, June 8: Double Teams

The Crossword, June 8: Double Teams
Don’t hide from our Monday crossword! This week's puzzle was constructed by Aidan Deshong, and edited by Hoang-Kim Vu. Aidan Deshong is a college student originally from Los Angeles. His greatest athletic achievement was winning his high school’s lettuce speed...

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• Dave McKenna

Donald Trump’s Birthday Plans Have Made Washington D.C. Hideous And Depressing

Donald Trump’s Birthday Plans Have Made Washington D.C. Hideous And Depressing
I went by the White House a few times in the last couple weeks to check out the UFC cage and other projects in the neighborhood related to Donald Trump's debacle of a sestercentennial celebration, called Freedom 250, and his “Safe and Beautiful Initiative,” a relentless plan...

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• Sabrina Imbler

Cat Fitzpatrick On Writing Transsexuals Into Iambic Pentameter

Cat Fitzpatrick On Writing Transsexuals Into Iambic Pentameter
Although Plato's Symposium is best remembered as a Socratic dialogue, it was also, at its core, a story about a dinner party. In Athens, symposia consisted of a lavish banquet followed by a lot of drinking, during which time the guests would deliver speeches. Like many dinne...

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• Tom Ley

Bari Weiss Even Worse At Her Job Than Previously Imagined

Bari Weiss Even Worse At Her Job Than Previously Imagined
Recently fired 60 Minutes correspondent Scott Pelley sat down with The New York Times over the weekend for a lengthy interview about the end of his tenure at CBS News, which Bari Weiss has been speedily destroying with her incompetence. Pelley had a few things to say that co...

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• Justin Ellis

The President Has Arrived To Fuck Up The Hottest Party In New York

The President Has Arrived To Fuck Up The Hottest Party In New York
The skies have never been more blue over the city of New York, the sun never more warm, and the Knicks-merch more profound and ubiquitous. The other day my daughter had her first basketball lesson on a court near Battery Park City and I felt a strange sensation in my heart w...

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• Israel Daramola

I Have Been Olivia Miles-Pilled

I Have Been Olivia Miles-Pilled
On Saturday, the Minnesota Lynx continued their early season dominance by beating the Seattle Storm for a seventh straight win. Natasha Howard has been excellent and provided 27 points in the game, but a big part of why this team looks like a monster despite their ostensible...

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• Ray Ratto

The Hurricanes Took Vegas To The Brink And The Rest Of Us Got Hockey Nirvana

The Hurricanes Took Vegas To The Brink And The Rest Of Us Got Hockey Nirvana
Well, the National Hockey League has hopelessly screwed itself now. It has unwittingly but in a very real sense created a Stanley Cup Final so wonderfully bizarre and delightfully absurd that the first game that ends up normal could absolutely result in its Toronto offices b...

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• Israel Daramola

The Knicks Know Something About Pressure

The Knicks Know Something About Pressure
Sometime around the end of the second quarter was the first time I thought that the San Antonio Spurs could not win Game 2 of the NBA Finals. The Knicks had ended the half up 4 after being down as much as 12 to the Spurs. Stephon Castle had been taken off the court in the mi...

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• Kelsey McKinney

Six Grown Men Can Be WAGs, Too!

In the seconds after Seth Jarvis scored the winning overtime goal for the Carolina Hurricanes, the Sportsnet broadcast cut to six exuberant men in Jarvis jerseys falling into each other's arms, screaming with joy, and about to cry with happiness. Their smiles were so big. Their enthusiasm was unmatched. Their love for one another is almost as great as their love for No. 24, whose jersey they all wear.

These are not normal fans. These are Seth Jarvis's friends. What are their names? I wish I could tell you. I watched hundreds of videos that the boys have posted on their social media (@goodolcanadianboys), but when they said their names—which was very, very rarely—I immediately forgot which one was which. They are not individuals anyway. They are The Jarvy Boys. They are his friends, and they love him so much.

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• Tom Ley

Report: Stupid Asshole Headed To New York To Ruin Everything

Report: Stupid Asshole Headed To New York To Ruin Everything
The New York Knicks take on the San Antonio Spurs in Game 2 of the NBA Finals tonight, and there is a very real possibility that the Knicks will head into the weekend up 2-0 in the series as they prepare to play their first Finals home game since 1999 on Monday. Can you imag...

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• Sohini Desai

Prisoners At Private ICE Jail In New Jersey Collectively Refuse Conditions Of Death

Prisoners At Private ICE Jail In New Jersey Collectively Refuse Conditions Of Death
Border Czar Tom Homan wants you to know that there is definitely not a hunger strike happening at Delaney Hall—a privately run ICE jail in Newark, N.J.—and also that he condemns this non-existent strike. On his ongoing Tour de Fox, one week Homan’s telling Laura Ingraham tha...

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• Luis Paez-Pumar

The Netherlands Has To Get Over The Hump At Some Point, Right?

The Netherlands Has To Get Over The Hump At Some Point, Right?

It's almost time for the World Cup. Before the tournament, we'll be previewing each of the top 15 teams by FIFA rankings that made the tournament. Why the top 15? Because that's how many we needed to do in order for the USMNT to make the cut. You can read all of our previews here.


Ah, the Netherlands. Pain and misery comes for all but one team at the World Cup every four years, but that pain and misery has magnitudes. A team like Morocco in 2022, for example, will have felt the pain of coming so close to a miracle, but the first African team to make the semifinals left with their heads held up high. It is only for the contenders, the countries that have shaped soccer history over the last century, that the worst disappointments are reserved.

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• Aaron Timms

The World Cup For Nobody Is Almost Here

The World Cup For Nobody Is Almost Here
Everything about this World Cup is designed to make you hate it. If you live here and you’re a soccer fan, tickets to games are a ripoff, fan zones are built to give you heatstroke, and Fox Sports’ soccer coverage is an unbroken insult to human intelligence. If you’re a loca...

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• Ray Ratto

Carolina Refused To Die, And The Stanley Cup Final Has New Life

Carolina Refused To Die, And The Stanley Cup Final Has New Life

Here is the cheap and lazy way to show that Game 2 of the Stanley Cup Final is the best postseason event of the calendar year so far, courtesy Chris Cuthbert and TSN: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpKJ11Q5auc

And by doing that, we've both saved ourselves the proverbial thousand words and hustled you pretty royally. This game could only be done justice in its original three-hour format, as opposed to the 10 minutes of editors' craft above, and we are even granting grace in that three-hour figure for the often stultifying pregame and between-periods migraineries. To be totally reductive about it, this is that rarest of sporting events in which nobody got cheated and everyone came away better for the experience.

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• Sarah Borus

Why Did The Brewers’ VP Of Communications Retweet This Racist Crap?

With the Milwaukee Brewers sitting comfortably at the top of the NL Central, you might think that it's an easy time to be their vice president of communications. Post the Jake Bauers highlight reel, oversee some decent memes featuring Bernie Brewer, and let the good vibes keep on flowing. All you have to do is not commit any big misstep. For example, don’t repost Elon Musk tweets in support of far-right British politicians who peddle racist propaganda about Britain being threatened by violent immigrants.

I would go as far as to say maybe just don't retweet Elon Musk at all, but what do I know? I'm not the vice president of communications for the Milwaukee Brewers. Tyler Barnes is, and on Tuesday he popped onto Twitter after a two-year hiatus to weigh in on British politics by retweeting Elon Musk's white genocide propaganda.

Tyler Barnes reposted

Elon Musk

"It is this or death"

Quoted post from Rupert Lowe MP: "Enough is enough - a deep line needs to be drawn in the sand. Talk is weak. Britain needs to say no more, and mean it. A Restore Britain Government, with the British people's approval, would put Vickrum Digwa to death..."

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• David Roth

The Dutch Style Of Pickup Soccer And A Dog Named Jeff, With Leander Schaerlaeckens

The Dutch Style Of Pickup Soccer And A Dog Named Jeff, With Leander Schaerlaeckens
It's not the sort of anxiety that haunts you, or maybe it just rates below too many of my other haunting anxieties to register. But as a non-soccer person, the quadrennial arrival of the World Cup has a peculiar and not altogether unpleasant anxiety about it; a bunch of stuf...

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• Veronica de Souza

Make It Nice: Bathrooms, Backyards, And DIY Ambitions

Make It Nice: Bathrooms, Backyards, And DIY Ambitions
Welcome back to Make It Nice, Defector’s best interior design advice column. Today we have a bathroom color dilemma, a backyard makeover, and someone wondering if they’re DIYing too close to the sun. GB asks:  I own an older townhouse type of condo in the southeast. ...

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• Giri Nathan

Karl-Anthony Towns Was Calm

Karl-Anthony Towns Was Calm
Even a Knicks fan would concede that Karl-Anthony Towns has his demons. They all stem from the whistle. During the regular season, the Knicks center was among league's most foul-prone players, racking up 3.4 per game. He led the league outright with 65 total offensive fouls....

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• Kathryn Xu

Cristopher Sánchez Gave Up A Run

Cristopher Sánchez Gave Up A Run
In the top of the seventh inning Wednesday night, with Cristopher Sánchez sitting at 81 pitches and his Philadelphia Phillies leading the Padres 1-0, San Diego's Jackson Merrill hit a single into the gap through left field, scoring Ty France and tying the game. This ended Sá...

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• Patrick Redford

Belgium’s Old Dogs Are Back For One Last Trick

Belgium’s Old Dogs Are Back For One Last Trick

It's almost time for the World Cup. Before the tournament, we'll be previewing each of the top 15 teams by FIFA rankings that made the tournament. Why the top 15? Because that's how many we needed to do in order for the USMNT to make the cut. You can read all of our previews here.


The term "golden generation" is often misapplied, defined downwards to mean "a decent group of good players." In the case of Belgium, though, it was totally apt. How else could one fairly refer to Kevin De Bruyne, Romelu Lukaku, Thibaut Courtois, Vincent Kompany, Mousa Dembélé, Axel Witsel, and the various Hazards that led Belgium to the quarterfinals in 2014 and the semifinals in 2018? This group came up together, fought for a fantastic result in Russia, only to travel to Qatar and eat shit.

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• Lauren Theisen

Shohei Ohtani Is Illogical

Shohei Ohtani Is Illogical
Before this season, pitching was pretty clearly Shohei Ohtani's secondary talent, and that's not an insult. He was just "also a pitcher" in the same way that Lady Gaga is also an actress or Kareem Abdul-Jabbar is also a writer. In his first two seasons as a Dodger, Ohtani on...

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• Luis Paez-Pumar

Germany Just Wants To Be Germany Again

Germany Just Wants To Be Germany Again
It's almost time for the World Cup. Before the tournament, we'll be previewing each of the top 15 teams by FIFA rankings that made the tournament. Why the top 15? Because that's how many we needed to do in order for the USMNT to make the cut. You can read all of our pre...